Get ready for a new, regular feature to World of Meh! Mad Libs!

Weeks ago, Chris and I bought a Mad Libs book at our local Borders. Why? Well, for starters it was on sale for $1.99, and the other reason is because we can. The Mad Libs were fun for us because we would do them in bed before going to sleep, and it also gave us a chance to just be incredibly silly. After we filled up the first book we quickly went back to Borders hoping that the books were still on sale. To our surprise they still were, so to be safe we picked up 4 books.

On a regular basis we will go and post up some of the Mad Libs we’ve done (obviously the better ones because all can’t be winners), and I actually feel kind of sorry for you guys. Get ready for a lot of penis, testicles, boobs, and other filthy things. We are truly sad individuals, but at least we are having fun! (Chris says: Those with delicate sensibilities will be offended.)

To start things off, here is one Chris provided the answers for, which are underlined. The topic is Alexander the Great:

In 356 B.C., Philip of Macedonia, the ruler of a province in northern Greece, became the father of a bouncing baby lamp named Alexander. Alexander’s teacher was Aristotle, the famous rug. When he was 20 years old, his father was murdered by William Shatner, after which he became pen of all Macedonia. In 334, he invaded Persia and defeated Leonard Nimoy at the battle of Vulcan. Later, at Arbela, he won his most important victory, over Darius the Third. This made him Starship Hoogybloog over all Persians. Then he marched to India, and many of his penises died. After that, Alexander began drinking too much urine, and at the age of 33, he died of an infection in the eyelash. His last words are reported to have been, “There are no more pillows to conquer.”

Another one Chris provided answers to was titled How to be a Photographer:

Many massive photographers make big money photographing sausages and beautiful kielbasas. They sell the prints to stiff magazines or to agencies who use them in flagpole advertisements. To be a photographer, you have to have a yardstick camera. You also need a thick meter and filters and a special close-up knob. Then you either hire professional trouser snakes or go out and snap candid pictures of ordinary bananas, But if you want to have a career, you must study very lustfully for at least 69 years.

So there you have it. Two fabulous Mad Libs, one with our first mention of penis, and a second filled with penile innuendos (Chris says: In-YOUR-endos).

….dirty bastard :p